Ask the Coach:To Move or Not to Move
October 25, 2008
Question: My boyfriend lives in Florida and is pushing me to move there. I’ve visited him and I hate where he lives. He can’t move because of work. I’m not happy without him but I don’t think I’d be happy in Florida. Do you think this one relationship can outweigh all the other drawbacks of uprooting myself and moving half way cross the country to a place I hate? I can’t seem to move one way or the other and I’ve been trying to make this decision for 5 months now.
Answer: Then don’t make this decision. Make another one. Chunk the situation down until you find a decision level you can live with. Can you make a decision to sublet your apartment and move there for a 90 day trial period? Can you make a decision to move there for a month? Can you make a decision to make a decision?
You’re hiding out in your indecision which has now become your comfort zone. The longer you hang out in your head and stay away from any kind of action the more difficult it will be for you to do anything. Take a shot. Nothing’s written in stone. You can always come back. Decision is not only the ending of something but the beginning of something else. Focus on the positive side of acting.
