Women Make Passes at Guys Who are Asses

This is it. The deep, dark secret that all women deny. We don’t want nice men.

We won’t tolerate them unless they’re related to us by blood or interviewing us for a job. Sure, they can buy us dinner every once in a while. But we don’t want to date them, sleep with them, or marry them. We say we do. We bemoan the fact to anyone who’ll listen that there are no “good guys” out there; that all men are animals, slobs or inconsiderate jerks. We say we’d take ten years off our lives to find a decent, kind honorable man.

We’re lying.

Why? Because we don’t like to admit that we willingly take shit in the name of love. It’s embarrassing and demeaning. We wonder what it says about our self-esteem that we stick with a guy who treats us badly. What would our mothers think?
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Ask the Coach:To Move or Not to Move

Question: My boyfriend lives in Florida and is pushing me to move there. I’ve visited him and I hate where he lives. He can’t move because of work. I’m not happy without him but I don’t think I’d be happy in Florida. Do you think this one relationship can outweigh all the other drawbacks of uprooting myself and moving half way cross the country to a place I hate? I can’t seem to move one way or the other and I’ve been trying to make this decision for 5 months now.

Answer: Then don’t make this decision. Make another one. Chunk the situation down until you find a decision level you can live with. Can you make a decision to sublet your apartment and move there for a 90 day trial period? Can you make a decision to move there for a month? Can you make a decision to make a decision?

You’re hiding out in your indecision which has now become your comfort zone. The longer you hang out in your head and stay away from any kind of action the more difficult it will be for you to do anything. Take a shot. Nothing’s written in stone. You can always come back. Decision is not only the ending of something but the beginning of something else. Focus on the positive side of acting.